Woah, I knew I hadn’t written in awhile, but it wasn’t until I signed in to my blog that I really realized just how long it has been. I apologize for those that were loyal readers to my blog, and I do promise to write, when I can….Hopefully not in a few months from now?
The summer came and hit like a brick for me. I enrolled in two summer classes, and being that I hadn’t been in college in almost two decades, I had to reteach myself A LOT. A lot , including how to be a student in an age of technology. Wow, I feel like the parent I am making that statement, but it’s true, it’s SO different now. Everything is different now to be honest.
To start, I love school. I used to have nightmares about being back in college when I wasn’t enrolled as a student, but those night mares have disappeared lately. For me, it’s my free time, plus I thrive on challenge. I love my kids like any mother does, heck I’m going back to school for my kids, but it’s also nice to escape to just be me, and pee alone.
When I had my first born son, I worked right up until my daughter’s maternity leave. Work is hands down easier than being home with the children. BUT, it doesn’t even touch the surface to how much happier I am to not be gone five nights a week until after midnight, and making a million memories for the reasons I get up in the morning. I will never regret this time at home with my babies, heading to school a few nights a week, home at a reasonable hour, and with them all day and every day. This was a decision that was best for my family, and for me, on every level.
That being said, I came back as a student, 18 years after graduating Rutgers, taught myself how to do research papers, read, write, oh and do algebra, and landed not one, but two A’s!!!! BIG pat on my back right there. Most people ask me how the H*#(#( am I going to do night school and raise my babies all day, but for me, it’s just part of my genetic makeup. I’m ALWAYS a go-getter, and I ALWAYS am doing 800 things at once. I strive for goals, and lazy isn’t a part of my DNA….except for that one time I had a preemie so I gave myself permission to do a lot of nothing for my second pregnancy.
There hasn’t been enough free time to sit and write and reflect unfortunately though, because all of my energy has been put into my homework, the house, kids, etc. I do hope to be able to write a little more often though.
The sails have massively adjusted to the winds that have blown in my direction. Do I miss being a radio DJ? Every day. It wasn’t just a job to me, it was part of me, who I am, and who I was. I probably would’ve retired there to be honest, but it just wasn’t the way the wind blew. I chose to adjust my sails to the storms I felt within, and am steering my ship one day at a time. I have goals, but every day’s weather seems to be what I base my life upon. I try to truly be present. Did I ever in a million years think I’d be a nurse? NEVER. Hands down, NEVER. Did I ever think I’d have a preemie at 32 weeks who would change my soul to the very core? Nope, never. But, I am SO glad that it did happen to me.
The thing is, we can sink or swim, we can adjust our sails to the wind, or get knocked down by the storm. I always choose to rise. My son’s early arrival was the absolute inspiration for me to choose nursing as a new career path. My daughter’s pregnancy confirmed that it was the BEST decision and time to do so. There are many many other factors obviously that made me choose to take a step down from my radio night show, but I will always keep my FCC friendly mature voice for the world wide web, and my inner immature voice has been heard by those who know me. I was in a situation that I didn’t feel was right for myself anymore, or my family, so I made the move to head onto a new path.
I’m not even a nurse yet, and I’m scared to death. That’s how I know I chose wisely. Anything that frightens me has always been worth fighting for. Like I said, I miss radio every single day, but I know I’ll find it again, when the air waves of a new wind blow my way, it’ll be when it’s meant to be. For now, I adjust…every. single. day.
Namaste, and Rock On!
I’ve missed you all.