Wow, I haven’t posted in a month and a half and I truly apologize!!! In my defense, I went out on my maternity leave shortly after my last post, and then was just trying to survive VERY pregnant, with a 20 month old, and then………….Emersyn Jane entered our lives on 11/25/17 at 10:30pm!!!
My pregnancy wasn’t the easiest of pregnancies. As I spoke about in previous blogs, I tend to get anything in life I REALLY want, by enduring quite the struggle/journey beforehand. The juice has ALWAYS been worth the squeeze, but I can’t say anything has ever just come to me without a fight.
For most of this pregnancy, I kept fear hidden in the back of my mind, and just tried to keep my mind busy and numb. My first born came into this world at 32 weeks, and even though the NICU experience changed my life for the better……I was still afraid. I longed for some kind of normalcy. I also knew that with Parker’s time in the NICU, I would spend at least 12 hours a day there, nursing and loving him. I knew if my daughter was born early, having a toddler at home, I wouldn’t be able to do that. I also knew though, that I could do my best, but at the end of the day, the universe, my daughter, me, and some magic were the ones who decided my fate. I had to surrender daily to the unknown.
On top of the fear of having a preemie, I had quite the opposite fears, of having a LARGE baby. I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes sometime around 29-30 weeks of my pregnancy. With Parker’s “born day” around 32 weeks, I definitely began to feel the weight, literally, of my pregnancy around this time. Thank god my OB took me out of work at about 33 weeks for health/sanity/and a million reasons! The diet was annoying, but nothing I couldn’t handle. I would prick my finger all day diet controlled by day, and I took insulin at night for my fasting blood sugar levels. Oh and on top of that, I took a progesterone shot, a BIG one, every single Monday to help me get my baby to term.
Needless to say, it was a LONG pregnancy. Ironically, the entire time I was pregnant I would tell everyone WE ARE DONE. I got my girl, I got my boy, DONE. It’s funny how it all disappears when the love of your life (one of them) finally is born. I honestly feel like I could do it again, but I have too many other goals and plans which will probably stop me…..Isn’t that crazy though?? Nine months of fear and hard days and so so so many doctor appointments to swear on my life that I’m done, but once she was born, think a little differently…Shhhh, don’t tell my husband !
That’s just the beauty of birth though. We feel SO empowered when it’s done, and deliriously tired and happy, that we ponder doing it again……
Two under two is quite the challenge I can tell you two weeks into the game, but I have NEVER in my life been more tired, more challenged, and more happy than I am now. Emersyn Jane came into our life around 37 weeks. They say that women who take the shots from 16-36 weeks typically have their baby a week or two later. Of course that’s not the case for everyone, but it seems it was for me!
I’ll never know, unless we do have a third, if I truly can’t get to 40 weeks. I did have quite the drama leading up to her birth 24-48 hours prior….but I’ll save that either for another blog post, or a podcast. One of my goals for 2018 is to start podcasting! I hope everyone who has been an amazing reader will continue to follow me there as well! What’s great about a podcast, is that you can listen to it anywhere, not just find the time to read.
Both of my children are here because of fertility help, and both decided they needed to be born on THEIR own terms, and just like that, we are a family of four. Our hearts are so, so full. And, I got my wish…..I got my normalcy……Emersyn was born 11/25 at 10:30 pm, and we were discharged Monday morning at 11am, BOOM.
Namaste, and Rock On!